The inevitability of the ceremony is simple: it's time to get married, and the need for marriage has never been doubted. Naturally, therefore, the wedding for young people and their loved ones is just one of life episodes, though this particular episode is the most, perhaps, remarkable. Marriage is an essential link in an unbroken chain of life, prepared by all the previous links: childhood, the events of adolescence, youth affairs, aging of the parents.
Let's recall this "turned, spun, chopped and anguished" plot of this popular drama heavily used in the books. The ceremony starts early, sometimes during the village festivities, perhaps in childhood, but its acts are always transparent and vivid. It begins with matchmaking.
In the old days, in the places surrounded by a lot of water was a custom of the tribe Chud to bring their daughters on boats to the festivities and fairs. Such brides were called "driftwood" brides. Father, brother or mother of a "driftwood" girl would leave her along with the dowry under the upturned boat while they went to the village to participate in the festivities. The local lads, grooms, immediately appeared on the shore. They overturned the boat after another, looking at and choosing a bride.
"Can there be a defect of the private man which is revered by the whole nation?" - thoughtfully asked Pushkin. Russians are not squeamish about the customs of the neighbouring nations, although they were picky. However, this custom in Russian villages did not have a wide acceptance. Getting guys and girls together occurred at the summer and winter festivities.
In winter, at the beginning of the new year, the groom's parents start to estimate and discuss what and how, whether the son by himself be able to find his future wife. A confident groom did not allow the options of several candidates, but not all guys were like this. Many needed parents' help often simply because they were shy.
On the appointed day, after selecting a "route" and praying, the matchmakers - the parents or close relatives set out for a proposal. It is difficult to describe and list all the courtship signs, conventions, and figurative details. From now on, until the first wedding's morning, everything has particular importance, presaged a fortune, or misfortune, everything took their appointed place. You had to know: how, where and after whom to step in, what to say, where to put this and that, notice everything that happens in the house and around, everything to remember, to predict and to think over.
Even sweeping snow off the boots on the porch, drying mittens at a stove damper, the behaviour of cattle, creaking of the floorboards, the wind's noise, everything takes on special meaning in the external design of matchmaking. Despite the clarity of calibrated by ages basic rules, each suit was unique, different by form from the other; the same expressions proverbs were told differently. By some, it came out particularly vividly, by others less so. Of course, all of this was recorded in the unwritten village annals. Later, the least interesting was totally forgotten, and all the other remarkable passed to the next generations. Traditional expressions retold by people without a spark inside them sounded trite.
The tradition, however, did not fetter imagination; on the contrary, it gave the original push, unleashing an oratorical gift even of the most tongue-tied matchmaker. However, a tongue-tied go-between it's like a horseless plowman or the opera singer without a voice. Therefore, one of the matchmakers certainly was a smooth talker.
They would drop in without notification, as always. People would cross themselves; take their seats, exchange greetings. Then, the bride would leave the room with sagacious hosts at once, tune to a specific way. Then, a real verbal duel would begin. Even when everything was decided before-head, father and mother of the bride would refuse at first, they say, we have to wait since our goods are first quality, they say, she is still young, you don't have enough land, etc. Then the matchmakers would act even more passionate, praising the groom and setting in motion all their eloquence. How to look people in the eye if the whole affair ends in failure?
There were times when, having achieved nothing, the matchmakers at their own risk took another bride, younger, or even older, an old maid sister, or went to another house or even to another village, if the groom was not very picky, and need for marriage became urgent.
Conventionally, traditional ploys and tricks go hand-in-hand in courtship with authentic, natural rituals related to specific circumstances of material and moral qualities. But it turned out that the conventional, permitted in such cases tricks would help participants of the ceremony. The folk customs spare pride. They seemed to help out the poor, knock off extra arrogance from the rich, encourage timid, and hold down too cheeky.
The proposal rarely ended with a firm promise; nevertheless, people would catch a shakiness of the voice, ambiguity of refusal. Sometimes while one of the bride's parents vehemently refused, the other would make secretly a subtle sign that says: everything will be okay, do not despair. Finally, in the end, after having worked hard, everybody parted, and the parents of the bride, as if out of favour or out of respect for the groom's family, promised to come and to see the place.
Visiting the place, seeing the house, where will live their "darling daughter" was the second step to the wedding. The bride's parents tried to come by chance, to see things as they are, but the bridegroom's relatives were also on alert. To not fall with the face into the dirt, surreptitiously, they were preparing for the visit. This folk tradition allows a minor forgery: it was allowed to borrow the goods from neighbours to show-off, and sometimes people brought blankets and fur coats into the groom... And yet it happened that by only the place appearances, the bride's parents firmly decided not to give away their daughter; but to not offend the groom, they would look for a pretext for refusal.
The bride's parents went around the house looked into the shed and into the yard, curious how much cattle and utensils the groom had if there was enough food stored if there enough bedding and in what condition is the bathhouse. Only after this would it become apparent if the suit is successfully accomplished or the groom has been rejected. If the suit has been denied, new matchmakers would be engaged...
In case of success, there is a brief pause, followed by the third part of the wedding action. In different places, it was called differently: handshake, contract, or bond. But the essence remains everywhere the same. At this moment, people finally decide to intermarry, plan the wedding date, the place where to live young, the amount of dowry.
Henceforth, a bride is engaged and begins work on the trousseau. (Now the canvases, which have been saved in the girl's chest since childhood, become handy!) The period between the wedding and the engagement was especially rich with chants, songs, omens, etc. Nothing has given so much to folk poetry as this part of the traditional Russian wedding ceremony! During "devishniks" (girls-only parties), when girls help her friend with the trousseau, several thousand first-class poetic lines...
The arrival of the gifts is the fourth act of the wedding's act. The final act is the wedding and wedding feast. Any part of the action, such as the suitor's "handshake," is an expanded and completely independent dramatic phenomenon.
An element of improvisation was present in all parts of the wedding, especially regarding the bride, matchmakers and the best man. The traditional structure allowed dozens of lament and song variants for a broad scope for self-expression.
The bride's lament was full of images but always expressing certain circumstances. A singing request and a response to it were also original, maybe unique in its kind, only depending on the family composition, characters, and other circumstances. There were no identical wedding songs, as there were no similar villages, families and brides. Melodies and most of the following wedding moments were consistently psychologically stable. Over the years, they fine-tuned and all ingrained in the ritual. These mandatory psychological factors often conflict with the emotional state of the wedding participants.
For example, like a current entertainer in the all-inclusive resort, the best man was obliged to entertain and amuse people. For this purpose, only traditional words and techniques are not enough, inspiration and talent are needed, and a serious man does not always want to joke. Likewise, respecting tradition, the bride had to cry in certain moments, but not every bride wants to cry at her own wedding. And the same rule allows a merry bride to secretly rub her eyes with onion to induce much needed at this moment tears.
Can we call this the need for hypocrisy? Hard to say… Probably not, because bigotry is not combined with the public, generally accepted concepts, it is more suitable for personal characteristics. In addition, the traditional rule at once would lose its force, ceasing to allow exceptions. If the bride did not cry at her wedding, it would be discussed by the whole parish, but the condemnation was not unanimous. Everything depended on the circumstances. Many, despite tradition, even encouraged such behaviour; others criticized, but not seriously. Soon, however, all differences were forgotten.
The traditional rules of folk custom are so surprising that their explicit rigidity permitted thousands of options suitable for different conditions and for any character. But the custom always and everywhere created the organizing principle, eliminated chaos, and helped reveal an individual's abilities.
Sometimes the best man began to amuse people not by inspiration but formally, as required. Gradually, he got into a mood, forgetting his inhibitions. So also, the bride, forcing herself to cry and wail at the beginning insincerely, steadily infected with the element of the traditional lament, began to cry for real. Her songs and chants are taken nature of improvisation soon, but improvisation is not insincere. Gifted artistic personalities create the most outstanding folkloric value in moments like these.
No comments:
Post a Comment